HOW TO SCREW UP AN INTERVIEW

We've  all  been interviewed for jobs.  And, we've all spent most of those interviews  thinking  about  what not to do. Don't bite your nails. Don't fidget. Don't  interrupt. Don't  belch. If we did any of the don'ts, we knew  we'd  disqualify  ourselves   instantly. But some job applicants go light  years beyond this. We surveyed top personnel executives of 100 major >American   corporations  and  asked  for stories of unusual behavior by job applicants.

The lowlights:

1.   "... stretched out on the floor to fill out the job application."

2.    "She wore a Walkman and said she could listen to me and the music at the same time."

3.    " A balding candidate abruptly excused himself. Returned to office a few minutes later, wearing a hairpiece."

4.    "...  asked  to  see  interviewer's   resume  to see if the personnel executive was qualified to judge the candidate."

5.    "... announced she hadn't had lunch and proceeded to eat a hamburger and  French  fries  in the interviewer's office - wiping the ketchup on her sleeve"

6.    "Stated  that, if he were hired, he would demonstrate his loyalty by having the corporate logo tattooed on his forearm."

7.    "Interrupted to phone his therapist for advice on answering specific interview questions."

8.    "When  I  asked  him  about his hobbies, he stood up and started tap dancing around my office."

9.     "At  the  end  of the interview, while I stood there dumbstruck, he went through my purse, took out a brush, brushed his hair, and left."

10.   "...  pulled out a Polaroid camera and snapped a flash picture of me. Said he collected photos of everyone who interviewed him."

11.   "Said he wasn't interested because the position paid too much."

12.   "While  I was on a long-distance phone call, the applicant took out a copy  of Penthouse, and looked through the photos only, stopping longest at the centerfold."

13.   "During  the  interview, an alarm clock went off from the candidate's brief  case. He  took  it out, shut it off, apologized and said he had to leave for another interview."

14.   "A  telephone  call  came  in for the job applicant.  It was from his wife. His side of the conversation went like this: "Which company? When do I  start? What's the salary?"  I said, "I assume you're not interested in conducting the interview any further." He promptly responded, "I am as long as  you'll  pay me more. "I didn't hire him, but later found out there was no other job offer. It was a scam to get a higher offer."

15.   "His  attach é  [case]  opened  when  he picked it up and the contents >spilled, revealing ladies' undergarments and assorted makeup and perfume."

16.   "Candidate  said  he  really  didn't   want  to  get  a  job,  but the unemployment office needed proof that he was looking for one."

17.   "...  asked  who  the  lovely babe was, pointing to the picture on my desk. When I said it was my wife, he asked if she was home now and wanted my phone number.  I called security,"

18.   "Pointing  to a black case he carried into my office, he said that if he  was  not  hired, the bomb would go off.  Disbelieving, I began to state why  he  would  never be hired and that I was going to call the police.  He then  reached  down  to  the  case,   flipped  a switch and ran.  No one was injured, but I did need to get a new desk."